IT IS OKAY NOT TO BE OKAY

IT IS OKAY NOT TO BE OKAY

#EXPRESS UNAPOLOGETICALLY

It is very unfortunate that in our society, we do encourage women to take care of their mental and emotional health along with their physical wellbeing, but we ignore the mental and emotional health of men altogether. It is still considered a stigma for the men to acknowledge, let alone share about the mental agony that they may be experiencing. 

It is high time that the men be shown compassion enough to encourage them to open up emotionally and address their vulnerabilities. Why are they expected to be ‘macho’ at all times? Why do they have to ride the high horse of strength at all times? Why is the show of vulnerability considered as a weakness for the men? They are as much human as the women and living in the same society they are also subjected to similar conditions, then why is it that the men are expected to be alright at all times? 

The sad thing is that, when a man does overcome his hesitancy  and decides to share about his agony, he is either ignored altogether, or, at worst, made fun of.  To strip a man off his dignity when he is low on the emotional front, hits adversely on his mental health. 

We must understand that it is never easy for a man to share emotional issues because it is very difficult for them to acknowledge it in the first place. They have been raised with constant programming from very early childhood that crying or expressing any emotions is not the way of a gentleman. When a little girl hurts herself while playing, everyone rushes to her to pacify; but when a little boy falls down while playing, he is expected to get up on his own and pretend as if nothing has happened. 

Mental health is a very vital aspect of one’s overall well being irrespective of the gender of the person. Men should be encouraged more and more to share about their emotional distress as well. It is difficult for them because they are made to believe along with the others that a man who is mentally and emotionally not strong at all times is not man enough. Judgements are what discourages them. Unfortunately, a lot of significance is attached to the opinion that others have of us. The impression that the world has of us has become more and more dominant with the growth of social media. 

Instead of experiencing the downside of social media, can't we utilise it to create a safe space which is devoid of judgements for the men to  express themselves unapologetically? Only doing so is not enough. Let us bring about a conscious shift in the way boys are raised. Let us consciously stop programming their mindset about being strong at all times and allow them to flow with their emotions as well. Stagnancy stinks as against the freshness of the flow. Let the boys and the men know that it's okay not to be okay!